7/27/11-The Longest Day

 Today I feel as if it is going to be the longest day in the world. Each step feels days long and when it comes to the stairs, I feel like a snail. The brightness outside bothers my eyes and I tell myself to walk faster to my destination. But no matter how fast I seem to walk, I can feel each and every step and watch the people around me move as if in slow-motion. The cause of this might be because I haven’t had any sleep since about 2 in the afternoon yesterday evening. Because of that fact, I feel as if two days are being blended together and that it is night time in my head. Over the past 6 weeks I have become basically nocturnal and have turned into a night-owl. I make it through each and every day with my eyes drooping and my mind wandering. What goes on through my head sounds a little like “Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Food? Sleep.” My body is beginning to reject this change and cannot operate at full capacity under these conditions. I really need to learn to get my sleeping patterns organized. It felt quite normal for me walking to McDonald’s at 5:30 in the morning for breakfast, which is something that really bizarre. Before I know it, I’m going to end up being a zombie soon.

RIP

Juan Castaño died the morning of March 3, 2069. Juan passed away in his sleep.

He was approximately 75. Juan was known for his love of technology and his aid in the development and running of one of the largest Computer companies in the world, IBM. He didn't ask to have a memorial service and instead wanted to be cremated and wanted his ashes to be spread wherever his wife would think appropriate. Juan was known for his great sense of humor throughout his life and always knew how to make a bad situation into a positive one. Although he was a modest and private fellow, those who really got to know Juan as a person know they will never forget such a character and that his memories will live on forever. He was more than just another person, but a brother, a son, a friend, and a husband. Rest in Peace Juan.

Watcher at the Gates

The "Watcher" at my gate is a character with a very pessimistic view towards the world. He's tall and always manages to wear dark clothing. With sharp teeth and a  red and black face. He always has that evil smirk on his face that lets you know he's up to something sinister. With his large pale eyes that watch everything and stare you down in the back of your mind. He tells you how it's okay to wait a little longer before you begin to write your paper. That there's always the option of not going to class and writing it the next day. He lives in a dark cave where he slumbers until it is time for him to do what he does best again. He feeds on the ideas you think are too dull and boring to put down on paper. He tells you that you can always find a better idea to write about and that the idea you have is to common and not deep enough. This is exactly what I have to fight against every time I begin to write a paper.

7/12

Where I was raised, words seemed to have a habit of forming themselves. Where words were missing and vocabulary was used in the wrong context, one made up words to fill up that pot hole in the middle of the street and just keep driving. It was much like an actor improvising when he or she forget their lines. The feeling of forgetting your lines is one you don't want to experience for too long, and you make up words that you assume sound good together for this exact reason. The clutter and chaos of what you might run into at a Hispanic Supermarket is much like where I grew up in. Running around looking for the words as if you were looking for groceries. Sometimes having to ask the employee who has no clue what you are saying and looks at you like you have a bug on your face.

More Than Just a Picture

The smell of the new cut well groomed grass fills your nose as you dig those first step in your cleats deep into the ground. It feels like stepping onto a cloud, it feels like home. The touch of that black and white ball surrounds your feet and you feel as if its nature for you to touch it and caress it with such warmth and passion. It feels at place by your feet as you keep it and never want to let go. You see a couple of big muscular men that stand in the way to your destination, the goal. You feel that rush and vibe flow through your veins as you fly by one, and then another. The electricity flowing through you is amazing, and you feel as if your on top of the world. But only one person still stands in your way. You tell yourself that you got this, and that this is where you belong. The giant white rectangle in front of you all of a sudden seems smaller and smaller as the person in it seems to grow bigger and bigger. But you don't let it stop you, you put all your effort into it as you feel the wind in your face hit you harder. You put all your force in your next step, and let it out. You hold your breath for the next few seconds as if the time paused for a split second. You did it......goal.

Senses

You open the door and squint as you come outside. Your eyes are adjusting to the light and you help them by putting on your sunglasses. It helps, but its still not enough. You slowly and heavily descend the stairs and crave that feeling of closing your eyes and laying down once again. The loud roar of the lawn mowers and the whizzing by of mopeds is all you hear. You smell the freshly cut grass as you notice the landscapers on both your left and your right looking up at you. The moist air seems to stick onto your fingers and hands. But you keep walking. The buildings all look similar and just giant statures of brick as you boggle through your memory and try to remember what class it is your going to again. You slowly make your way there as you fight the need to yawn and stretch over and over again and wish it wasn't so early.

Comparing and Contrasting

Although each writer has a different approach when it comes to writing, they all tie together in some ways very often. This is what seemed to happen in the three passages we were asked to read in this first week. This Included Anne Lamott’s “Shitty First Drafts”, Lorrie Moore’s “How to Become a Writer, and Gail Godwin’s “The Watcher at the Gates.”  In each of these readings, each writer seemed to deal with what might seem a very odd conflict at first, but a very similar one between the three of them nonetheless. This conflict was change. What each writer had in common, was that in order to accomplish what they had to do, they had to go through a series of changes before they were able to get where they were trying to go. Anne Lamott showed how you must write everything down at first, even if it is crap, because by the end, that’s how masterpieces are made, through change. Godwin’s approach was a tad different, but still included change. He showed us how he must change his form of writing and when he writes so that his “Watcher at the Gates” was unaware and unable to stop his ideas from flowing smoothly. Moore’s change seemed to be a bit more drastic than the others. She described to us how change must go on throughout your entire life, and not just your writing. How you can change from being a child psychology major, to a writer from one day to the next. We are able to learn from these authors because they show that we must not be afraid of change. That in order to get to our goal of a perfect paper, we must encounter our shitty first drafts, or alter our lives a bit and try a new major, or maybe even make a picture of our “watcher” and turn it towards the wall. The authors’ approach to this change seemed to grow more and more unreal as we moved from story to story. Lamott’s view was the one that seemed quite realistic and what her as a writer most likely goes through. Moore’s view seemed to be very similar in a way to that of Lamotts, but to a much farther extent to where it seemed like there were very unnecessary forms of changes going on. Lastly, Godwin’s approach took an imaginative side to the issue and let us personify what really might be stopping us from writing drafts, a “watcher”. Whatever form we decide to take, it involves us trying something new and changing from the normal. Change. It’s what makes good writers great and lets us work on the abilities we already have and make them better.